When The Doubt Creeps In

That nagging feeling is back again. I am better prepared each time it happens, but it's never easy.

Photo by Ian Walker

What Am I Making is ad-free and currently operating without any paywall to keep access open to all of our readers. This work is powered solely by paid subscribers. Please consider a paid subscription today.

About a year ago, just before Thanksgiving of 2022, I started a new routine. It was the most minimal of new habits, but it led to something remarkable; actual substantive change.

On that day, I got up, immediately jumped into my jeans and then promptly made my bed. From there, I headed into the kitchen to start a pot of coffee and take my allotment of meds for the day. Next, I gave my face a good scrub, and intently brushed my teeth.

It sounds identical to the morning routine of millions of other Americans. There was nothing special within the list of tasks, nor anything remarkable in a grown man having completed them on his own. No, what was special was that I had done them all before doing anything else.

Because I struggle with depression, ADHD and chronic anxiet…