Unstuck
The story of a long weekend on the road in The Stick Arounds with a kid playing drums, and the rest of us remembering how to be in a band again.
Not that long ago, I was sure that The Stick Arounds were done as a band. Things had seemingly reached a natural point of change within the members of the outfit. Until this past weekend of gigs, it had been nearly six months since our string of last shows. During that break, we had not practiced as a band or even been able to get all five of us together in the same room at the same time.
As 2024 began, I found myself really down about the band that has been the musical fulcrum of my creative life. It has gotten more and more difficult to book good shows both in and out of Michigan. We’ve watched venues close up shop, and seen venues stop offering live music due to the financial instability of live entertainment. Places that used to feel like home are now gone or irrevocably altered.
Booking has never been an enjoyable task, but as we have gotten older and the venue pool has shrunk, we have also seen many of our compatriots step away from band activities, or they have curtailed their investment of time significantly. This has inevitably led to a dearth of available spots to play and bands to collaborate with to host shows. We have also struggled to find new bands in the midwest as the number of viable acts in the market seems to be at a nadir right now as well.
Frankly, as the Sticks dates got closer and closer on my calendar, I was filled with a sense of anxiety and unease. I had the sense that my band might be falling apart.
Before we even began to prepare for the tour, our drummer Kernel informed us of a scheduling issue. His son Joe, would be graduating in the spring and the weekend we had slated for shows was the same weekend as graduation. Of course, we could not ask Kernel to miss that, and we found ourselves with a decision to make. It was a binary choice, we could cancel the shows, or we could find a replacement drummer.
As we began to ponder our predicament, I became almost positive that we would scrap the dates, that would be that, and the band would end not with a bang, but a whimpering trio of cancelled gigs. It seemed an ignominious end to something I held so dear, but it also felt inevitable.
Exploring the idea of replacement drummers, Jason, the Sticks lead guitar player jokingly suggested that guitar player and singer, Jeff’s son, Weber play these gigs with us. On its face the idea seemed a little whacky. Web would turn 18 just three weeks before the shows. It would take him weeks to prep, and he would be forced to spend a long weekend with four old dudes, one of whom was his Dad, and play a bunch of their original geezer power pop songs.
We all wondered if he would have any interest, or how the logistics of taking an 18 year old on tour with a 50-something rock band might work. Shockingly, the kid was into it, and we agreed to give it a go. We all know Web to be a smart, kind, and funny young man who is already an excellent drummer in his senior year of high school, and even he knew that this was gonna take some work to get two sets together in a few weeks time.
At the first few rehearsals I felt terribly conflicted. I was enjoying playing with Web, and seeing my dear friend Jeff get to share this experience with his son. Still, I couldn't shake the feeling that we were just keeping the patient on life support. I began to resign myself that this would be the last weekend of shows with The Stick Arounds.
It would absolutely be worth the last set of shows to allow Jeff and Weber to experience a Father and son weekend on tour, but I also felt terribly sad that my final shows with the band would be with a replacement lineup. I found the first few practices to be heavy, and almost somber affairs. I felt as though I were gong through the motions. Did everyone know we were coming apart at the seams?
The Stick Arounds originally began as something of a side project. Jeff asked Jason and I if we were interested in being in a power pop band and we both jumped at the chance. Jason was still playing occasionally with his longtime outfit, Calliope and I was still playing and recording in The Pantones. For his part, Jeff was still playing intermittently as well with his honky-tonk outfit, The Gentleman Callers. None of us expected The Sticks to be a primary focus for any of us, and for the first several years, we played a handful of gigs a year and it was a fun way to share music and deepen our friendships with each other.
With the shifting sands of time came changes for all of the band members. The Callers, Calliope, and The Pantones all ceased to be regularly active bands just a couple of years into the formation of the Sticks. Soon, we found ourselves making a live record, and finding a new rhythm section. By the spring of 2017 we had a live album of new original songs out on CD and vinyl, and we had finalized our current/classic lineup of the Sticks.
THE STICK AROUNDS
Jeff Gower - Lead Vocals and Guitar
Matthew Carlson - Lead Vocals and Guitar
Jason Lantrip - Lead Guitar and Backing Vocals
Ian Walker - Bass Guitar
Joel ‘Kernel’ Kuiper - Drums
Things truly took off from there. We quickly finished work on a second full-length record which we recorded completely independently and released on colored vinyl and CD. The album even received some nice critical acclaim and afforded us a chance to play better gigs with bigger bands in new towns in and out of state.
From there, we released a single every month for an entire year and then released that collection on CD and lathe cut vinyl. The gigs kept coming and the momentum carried us forward. We rallied through the pandemic with a string of remote videos of us including one for a new song called ‘Redtail Hawks’ that we released on our 2021 EP, Waiting For The Click. After the initial rush of the release, the momentum began to slow down, and then it eventually stopped altogether. The Stick Arounds were seemingly stuck.
My band Harborcoat also released a full length in 2021 and I worked the record very hard for the next year with band and solo shows. Early in 2023, I began my work here at What Am I Making in earnest. There isn’t time for everything all the time, and it’s been tougher in the last couple of years to logistically make The Stick Arounds the priority they deserve to be.
As I have spent my time and efforts largely focused on other pursuits, Kernel has been drumming relentlessly in The Wild Honey Collective, recording and touring all over the country. Jason and Jeff have spent the bulk of this last year performing acoustic duos shows as Deer & Elk. They are playing several times a month and are quickly building a following in the region.
You might be wondering, “If you’re all so busy, why is it a big deal if your band doesn't do stuff anymore?”
That’s a fair question, but you must not have ever been in a band if you’re asking that. Most bands break up because they don’t get along. They argue, have dysfunctional relationships, harbor resentments, fight about money, or fall out over “creative differences”. The Stick Arounds don’t have that for the most part. We are all flawed human beings, but we all truly care for each other. There is no money to fight about and we have always somehow been able to make our creative differences an asset and not a detriment.
Being in a band is like being in a gang. I love being in this gang. I am incredibly proud of the work that I am currently doing as a solo performer. The upcoming tours this Summer and Fall are going to be some of the true highlights of my year, and likely my entire career, but they will be carried out by me alone. There won’t be someone to share the laughs with in the van, or somebody to carry out the last two loads of gear, because I am still working the merch booth. These trips will be a blast, but they won’t be like getting in a van with my best friends and setting out to conquer the world.
As we all focused on our disparate pursuits, no one came calling to ask what the Sticks might be up to. Each of us, in our own way, seemed to have the feeling that if The Stick Arounds disappeared into the ether no one would even fucking notice. It felt like all of the work that we had done, the recordings, the shows, the posters and albums, the networking and more, was for us to be simply forgotten. It seemed as though no one outside The Sticks cared what happened to us, and no one inside The Sticks seemed to have the time or energy to save it from drowning.
So, I found myself going to practice each Monday to keep the patient alive long enough get through our last weekend of shows with Weber. Each week began to get successively more difficult for me to the point where I began to dread the coming of Monday evening and the feeling of seeing the gigs through just to dissolve the band afterward. Just thinking about practice made me nauseous.
As the situation with the band seemed to get more and more difficult, I became more increasingly aware that this was also affecting my friendships with my bandmates outside of our time in The Stick Arounds. I felt awkward in social situations around them. I struggled to maintain a straight face while inside I was in turmoil that I was losing my band.
Finally, I faced my fears and sent an email to the band. I confessed to how I was feeling, and shared my fears that I was losing the band, and in turn my best friends. Jeff responded almost immediately confirming my fears, that he had seen The Sticks as something that was wrapping up.
I understood his viewpoint. He felt that the work of being in a five piece band that plays original music was no longer worth the reward we seemed to be getting out of the deal. We made no money, were struggling to book decent shows, we saw bands and venues going out of business, and no one seemed to care that we had been virtually absent for two years. All sings pointed to ending the band.
Still, we had to go through with the shows and I found myself worried that I’d be unable to make the trip. My anxiety about the issue became so pitched that it triggered more than one panic attack. I resolved to find a way to make this as pleasant as possible so I could give this weekend of shows to my dear friend and his son. Still, I was grieving for the loss of my band and I began wondering how deep the chasm might get this time inside my own head.
Over the next several days, we exchanged a series of emails that confirmed that we all still cared for each other and we still enjoyed playing, but we all felt disillusioned in one way or another with how things were going. We resolved to not make any official decisions or make any declarative statements. Instead, we planned to play the shows and then take the rest of 2024 off as a band and see if 2025 might be a better time for us to try a new release and/or a run of shows again.
To be very candid, the answer was bittersweet for me. I was relieved to know that I was not completely losing the gang I loved being a part of. Yet, I was also fairly certain that this was yet again another example of us delaying the inevitable conclusion of the band. Still, it allowed me to escape from my intense feelings of grief and depression, and afforded me more comfortable conditions under which to go on a long weekend tour.
Meanwhile, with each successive practice Weber got more confident and his playing tightened and improved. The kid had chops for sure. The tempos could be a bit wild at times, but his energy and musicality were present from the start. As he corralled those innate talents, we helped guide him along the way, and he grew leaps and bounds in a very short time.
The final practice before the weekend of shows the kid absolutely slayed it. We’d had to cancel practice the week prior due to an illness, and I had wondered what might happen losing a week or prep work so close to launch. After we finished for the night and Web had gone home, as we were packing up our gear, Jeff said quite casually, “If we play that well this weekend, I am gonna be thrilled.”
Over the course of three days we played that well and even better. Weber played with the confidence of a veteran, and smiled throughout the entire endeavor. Playing with someone other than your regular drummer is always a wild thing, playing with an energetic young man out on his first set of shows on the road is another thing altogether. Yet for all of his exuberance, Web stayed pretty reigned in and performed with absolute aplomb.
We had originally been scheduled to play the first night of the long weekend at a club in Toledo but they had booted us to book a touring band they have anytime they come through town. This was just another dose of rejection in our wave of negative energy around the Sticks leading up to the gigs. Thankfully, we managed to find a great gig as a fallback.
On the first night at Lansing Brewing Company, we had the benefit of a hometown show as a send-off. It was not a venue we had played before, but it would give us a chance to let Web play for his friends and family. It would also allow us a warm-up show with Web to make sure we had our shit together. The setting offered a solid gig with a nice safety net.
We packed the Stock Room at LBC before the music began at 8:00 pm, and Web rolled through two full sets with the old guys and absolutely crushed it. Between sets and after the show, he was surrounded by adoring fans and friends. The kid isn’t even outta high school yet and he got to play rock star. It was so great to see him get accolades for the show too. He’d worked his ass off and he deserved the praise.
The following morning, we all met up at Jeff’s to load up and hit the road for Madison, Wisconsin. With a car topper stuffed to the gills and some clever packing techniques, we managed to squeeze all of our gear and ourselves into the Ford Explorer to head west.
We landed at The Wisco, a dive bar in a hip section of Madison, after checking into the hotel. The Wisco, like so many Wisconsin bars, is set in a large old house that has the first floor occupied as a bar and grill. We have played many of these over the years in Madison and Milwaukee. They have a cozy, homey vibe. And there is almost always wood paneling.
Gentle Brontosaurus opened the show with their brand of guitar pop. There are two singers in the band and they, like the Stick Arounds, swap lead vocal duties and then sing harmonies as the other sings lead. The band featured a ton of keyboard and trumpet as well, which often truly enhanced the band’s original songs which were quite good.
We played in the second slot of the night, between the two local bands, which is always the classy move for the in-town bands. This allows the out of town band to benefit from the crowd still hanging around that came to see the first band and the crowd that shows up a bit early for the headliner. It helps to ensure that the out of town band gets as many butts in seats as possible.
When it came time for The Stick Arounds to step up to the plate, the room was fairly close to full. At The Wisco, that doesn’t take too many bodies, but it felt good to play to an attentive room. We then proceeded to tear through twelve songs in just 42 minutes. There were moments where Web played songs with a bit too much pace, but it all stayed glued together. We played with an energy and a brashness that we had been lacking for years. The kid was making us younger, ever so slightly.
Headliners Heavy Looks closed out the night. They were a wicked tight, slightly funky four piece that had a Death Cab For Cutie meets The Beths vibe to their sound. They write really terrific original songs filled with solid hooks and great guitar work. I really dug this band.
Saturday morning found us at breakfast spot, The Tip Top Tavern for a delicious brunch and coffee. I treated myself to a Negroni and a Pastrami Hash breakfast. After the meal, we went out to explore Madison on a beautiful spring day. The city was packed with runners for a 5K and a giant end of academic year party for the students at the University of Wisconsin.
The five of us strolled along the streets visiting the occasional vintage clothing shop or retro store to scope a deal. Eventually, Ian and I landed at Nick’s Restaurant, an old school bar where we’d had drinks on our last visit to town. Nick’s feels like the kind of place where a dude named Carmine or Jimmy got knocked off in the hallway downstairs near the men’s room. We had a couple of Wisconsin Old Fashioned’s, and whiled away the early afternoon getting to know our delightful server, Mary who sadly informed us that Nick’s would be closing for good on May 11. We made a toast and said our goodbyes and made it back to the street.
Across from Nick’s sits the Madison Museum of Contemporary Art, which was free. We wandered in for a lovely visit that was highlighted by the work of sculptor Federico Uribe who crafts sculptures from everyday objects. The first piece in the exhibit as you enter the hall is a five foot panda bear made out of bullets. It is a gorgeous and harrowing work that stirs all sorts of mental imagery.
Inside we were treated to several rooms of Uribe’s fascinating work. Some of it is stark and arresting like the panda, other pieces are more whimsical and even childlike. One of my favorites was a lion’s face made from guitar parts and strings. There was also a pair of charming pieces that involved old wooden tennis rackets. It was a terrific exhibit.
The rest of the museum was small, but lovingly curated and quite interesting. I especially enjoyed the rooftop sculpture garden which offered a few pieces of sculpture and a lovely view from the museum’s top deck. Eventually, we made our way back to the car and headed towards Rockford and our hotel to get freshened up and get a bit of rest before our gig.
Pig Mind’s Brewing in Machesney, IL is located out in an isolated industrial park. As we followed the directions to the venue, we began to get worried that we were on a wild goose chase. Then, just as we were about to begin to panic, we noticed the brewery off in the distance. Being in such a remote spot can often mean zeroo crowd at a place like this. As we approached the venue, I feared that we might be playing to handful of folks who could give a damn.
When the van pulled up to the load-in dock, I jumped out to run inside and get directions from the staff. As I entered, the place was packed from room to room. The space where the bands were slated to play was filled with a stage and a whole host of folks on two floors waiting for music to begin. We loaded our gear in to the space and bellied up at the bar for a beer and a meal.
The food at Pig Mind’s is all vegan. I had figured that I could get a nice pasta dish or a salad, but it appeared that all of the offerings were spins on bar food done with vegan ingredients. I opted for a Detroit style pizza with mushrooms and ordered a pint.
As we waited for our food to arrive, the first band, Mana Kitorso kicked things off with an enjoyable brand of indie-folk that reminded me of Neutral Milk Hotel or Woods. Damien the singer, has a clear, higher voice that worked really well with the band’s original material. The crowd was attentive, receptive, and even excited. The whole room sounded great too, which isn’t always easy in a space filled with glass and concrete.
The Stick Arounds got the cherry second slot once again and we were off like a shot. Onstage, the spacing was tight, but the sound was terrific. There was a marvelous mix for vocals in my monitors and everything just felt balanced and solid to me. Jeff and Jason and I sang particularly well on Saturday and the crowd seemed to love what we were laying down. After our set, there was a steady stream of takers at the merch booth, always a welcome sight.
Our friends in Half Catholic closed the night, and damn what a show they put on. These guys have quickly become one of my very favorite bands that we have ever played with. I regularly listen to their recent EP, and I was not only stoked to play with them again, I was just excited to see one of my favorite bands right now play a show. Their sound is absolute power pop, and I love it. They remind a lot of Sloan in the way they meld melody and guitars together and in thow the songs are forged. I also hear lots of Fountains of Wayne, Teenage Fanclub, and Big Star in there as well.
We got to hang with the bands for a while after we wrapped up and then we loaded out to the car and headed for our home for the night. We arrived back at the hotel just before 11:00. I’m not sure how the youngster in the crew felt about the early curfew, but the old dudes were totally excited about it.
Sunday morning, we got around and made our way to the Stockholm Inn in Rockford, an old school Scandinavian pancake house that is owned in part by Rick Nielsen of Cheap Trick, who grew up in Rockford. The highlights of brunch, for me at least, were the orange/lingonberry juice I ordered and seeing the guitar that Nielsen had painted with the Swedish flag that hangs near the exit of the restaurant.
On the ride home, we chatted about the weekend, and what a genuine success it had been. We had spent months thinking that no one gave a shit about our band at all, and then we managed to limp our way to a weekend of awesome shows. Surely, we came through with flying colors, but the success of these dates was anything but secured from the get-go. To be able to look back on what might have been our most successful long weekend so far as a band at this moment feels particularly gratifying.
As we talked about the success of the weekend and how we hoped to repeat a weekend like it again in the future, Weber smiled and asked, “What do you guys think was different about this time that it was so much more successful?”
The van howled with laughter.
It took a kid, one of our own kids, to show us that we forgot how to just play. I don’t mean play music or shows, I mean PLAY! He reminded us that this is supposed to be fun. We are not doing this for other people. We are doing this for ourselves, for our gang. I was reminded that there is no feeling on Earth quite like singing your songs with your best friends in front of a live audience. It feels special, almost magical. I don’t wanna let that go. After this weekend, I am a little more sure that I won’t have to.
Cheers,
Matty C
So you're saying the Stick Arounds stuck around.
Thanks for a great walk down memory lane, the houses in Wisconsin; bars on the first floor and residence on the upper level. So many memories in several of those . . . And Madison was my back yard. It’s still all that!!!! Loved this piece, Matty C.!